Feeling Poetic, Tyler Perry, And A Lot On My Mind

This is going to be one long and maybe rant like post. Maybe. I am just feeling a bunch of emotions right now and I need some type of release. Then I thought to myself that hey, I have this blog that I created and I could use that. Maybe someone will read and have some advice. Fist there has been this poem brewing inside of me and it needs to be released before I explode. The thing is I have not yet written it. So I am about to make it up right now. So here it is.

Untitled…The Way I am feeling Now.

I am confused
Maybe because so much is right it has to be wrong
I am used to chaos around and this calm is scaring the hell out of me
I pray that this is not the calm before the storm
But the winds are blowing hard
The clouds are getting darker and I can’t see that damn silver lining that all those damn perpetual optimist keep telling me about

I am scared
Maybe because I am in love with two people
I don’t know what to do
One is completely off limits and my best friend
I know he will kill my heart take it and run away
He already has but my crazy mind is trying to rationalize my feelings for love unattainable because that is the best kind when you trap it and hold it down
The next is easy yet unsure Wanting the world that I am to eager to give him but does notknow what the hell to do with it

I am lost
And I am tired of looking for myself
Where the hell did I go
In between work school work again no play all day monotony where have I drifted off to
Schedule so mundane I am going insane and I hate it
But this is what I must do to get that Degree to get that seven figure salary because six just won’t do
I want it all I can see it
I can taste it
I can almost touch it
But what will I do when I get it
Leave it find something else to obsess about

I am tired
Wanting to end it all
Not in a way that will leave me lifeless because suicide is not poetic
But I just want to go home
Back to Mama’s house crawl in her bed and let her rub my head until all the bad thoughts go away
My safe haven
My way out
My sad sorry retreat
What shall I do

I am confused, lost in love and tired of what it is doing to me

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO that was a lot to write down. I feel purged and even more confused than before. And what’s worse is a mosquito bit me on my ass through my denim jeans and now my ass itches. Great.

Okay on to the next.

I hope all of you went to support Tyler Perry.
That movie was off the damn chain. I Love Love Loved it. It was by far his best work. I am going to go and see it again this weekend. It was just that damn good. I thought all the actors did great and Jill Scott was of course the icing on that triple chocolate on the cast. And ladies I just have to say the men looked so damn good. Tyler Perry is sooo fine to me. I know I am not the only one that thinks so. And since I have seen the movie I have been listening to Marvin Gaye’s I Want You everyday. If you go see it you will know why. My girl Janet Jackson was awesome. Her performance was amazing. She really drove home the pain of her character. I give this movie the seal of approval. I just have to find the soundtrack now. I bet it is off the chain.

Music of the Month

Of course you all probably know who the winner is.

Ms Jill Scott

Her new album The Real Thing is wonderful. As most people already know she is going through a painful divorce with Lyzel in E-Flat. I thought that marriage would last forever, but you never know what is going on in the private lives of the celebrities that you see on the television. The thing is that Jill writes from her life. The Real Thing is a montage of music describing the breakdown and build up of a person who is going through losing what they thought was forever. Her openness allows you to feel each emotion. Sorrow, pain and suffering then she takes you from that to happy, cocky and horny in the next beat. She is the epitome of an open book. She let it all hang out and you have to respect someone with that type of courage. I listen to her CD everyday. I have to make myself turn it off so I don’t get tired of listening to it. But I doubt if I will. This one will be in heavy rotation for a very long time.

This is a Poetry Blog...Right?

I suppose that since I started this blog to inform people about the different poetry events going on around my area and in different venues around the US I would update you all on what's going on in my life with Poetry. It has been a lot so be prepared to read and read and maybe read some more.

The first thing is that I have been writing more and more everyday. I think I am writing more now than ever before. It is fun seeing all of the things that i am coming up with. I have written love poems, hate poems and why aren't you with me because that Bitch you are with now ain't shit poems. Poems about poems and poems about not wanting to write poems. It has been a completely liberating experience. Everything that I had been doing for the longest time has had to deal with politics and racism. I think ever since the Don Imus incident I have been on a rampage. I guess I had a lot to get off of my chest. But the great thing is that I am getting some wonderful poetry out of it. At least I think so.

The second major poetry thing that has happened to me is that I hosted my very first Poetry Reading on Saturday, September 22, 2007 at the Mission House. Montgomery's premiere jazz and blues lounge. I was sooo excited. At first I was asked to come out and perform because I had done a couple shows there and some people suggested me. Can you believe it? There is a buzz about me. I was geeked. So I was all set to just perform, because that is always good enough for me but then about a week before the show I was asked to host. Of course I said "Hell Yeah". I was so excited. I was to be the host of the Mission House's First Groove vs. Soul night. Groove outside with a DJ that would play music from the 70'sk, 80's and 90's and get some Soul in you system with live poetry and art in motion on the inside. Ya'll know some mess had to go on that night right? When I got there I talked to one of the Managers and she informed me that since it was a bit rainy outside they would move the DJ inside and move us poets to a smaller room. I was like "how are we supposed to do poetry and have a DJ in the same house?" And she was all it would work out and everything would be alright, but ya'll know that everything was not alright. The music was entirely too loud and my poets were mad as hell. At the end of the night I was able to pull it together and I must say that it was quite successful. Even though they played me when it came to the DJ. The manager said that he wanted to do it again and I replied "not with a damn DJ in the next room." So we will see what will happen if there is a next time.

Poet of the Month

It has been a long time since I gave out this honor. So I just wanted to share a poet with you all that I think is truly awesome. The Poet is young, handsome and most of all talented. Dahlak Brathwaite is this month's Poet of the Month. Check him out at his website or google the brother.
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendID=5693714



Peace
IAMNOTANIGGA (And I have proof)